“Even in a room full of people, my eyes always search his, only to see him already looking at me. I love him watching me watch, my whole body burns.”

When two souls meet and kiss, a third soul is born: the soul of the relationship. It has its own physical, emotional and spiritual wild land, with its own cycles, climate, weather, nutritive needs, flora and wildlife. There, upon these lands, the two lovers walk their devotional paths together and shape it all through their words, hands and every day gestures.

Synastry is a chart, a land, where the energies of two people interweave and interact – so it shows us how two people’s combined energy creates their relationship or way of relating to one another. But it always starts from each person individually. We can give to another only what we already have within us, and we cannot magically create or experience something that we don’t have within us.

What is Venus?

Venus is love, and it is also our sense of touch, our sensual sexuality.

In a woman’s chart, Venus represents the intent of her feminine energy and who or how she is expressing herself as in this life. Venus is the way we may express our love and beauty, and how we desire to be approach, and how we want to receive physical pleasure or anything that touches us through our senses of scent, touch, sound etc. And there are so many ways to make love; using only our genitals can be rather boring. So Venus wants to experience herself through everything in life, and make beauty when she engages with it or is inspired it. Venus is a muse, and she gains her shape through formlessness – like in dream state. This means that when we feel inspired, when we give of ourselves fully, this lightness of being then forms into a beauty, into pleasure, into love. Venus awakes within us when we are kissed by the lover’s kips.

In a man chart, Venus is his inner beloved. Upon meeting her, he is aroused in courting and approaching. This is his ideal regarding ways of expressing love and pleasure, and what he will find attractive in a partner regarding looks, but also movements both in words and gestures. When a man is able to connect and merge with his inner beloved, and the qualities of his Venus, he is able to come into a sacred marriage and make better decisions with the partners he’ll attract – and how he will relate to them. In Shamanic astrology, a man’s Venus represents the development of his inner beloved as well as what he desires and longs for in a partner to fulfill his soul’s purpose.

What is Mars?

Mars is passion, and it is how we court the that which we want and desire.

In a woman’s chart, Mars is her inner beloved – this is the man she desires to mate with. These are the qualities she finds arousing and attractive within the masculine polarity, and when she is able to integrate this within herself, she comes into her sacred marriage – which then, naturally, pulls in her ideal partner. Otherwise, just like in the case of Venus’ inner beloved for a man, she may attract the shadow sides because she hasn’t yet merged her own yang energy. In Shamanic astrology, a woman’s Mars represents the development of her inner beloved as well as what she desires and longs for in a partner to fulfill her soul’s purpose.

In a man’s chart, Mars is how he courts and approaches his desires. Mars represents the intent of his masculine energy and how he may be expressing himself in his life. It’s also his virility and sexual nature, and how he feels as a man. So if his Mars comes into a hard aspect with someone else, he needs to pace with more awareness, and learn the unique needs of his partner, otherwise his way of approach will not be attractive and he’ll be turned down. Mars aligns to his natural and most positive manifestation when his actions are aligned with values, integrity, responsibility, accountability and intentional listening – so that he understands, and gives what is needed, which will then help him receive what he desires.

Art: “The Lovers” by Marco Proietto

Venus Conjunct Mars in Synastry

Venus and Mars are the eternal lovers, always following each other in the sky; they are inseparable and when love blends passion, it is irresistible.

When these two meet, sexual attraction powerfully sparks at first sight, or touch. They may be magnetically drawn to each other, and the amount of chemistry they feel may be wholebodied, and burning. It’s a cosmic marriage of lovers, as within so within, the inner has met the outer.

Venus finds Mars as their sensual and physical ideal, and is incredibly attracted to Mars – to the way Mars moves, how they look, how they speak, how they touch, how they act. Venus’ whole body and dreams are inspired by the way Mars approaches her sexually and physically. If it’s the man’s Venus, even if the way is more introverted and passive and feminine, he is just driven mad and entirely aroused by the way she moves and looks, and everything; and loves fantasizing about her.

Venus loves fantasizing about Mars. But the passion can be so overwhelming that it might feel a bit too much and out of control.

So for example, if it’s a man’s Venus, he might be so overwhelmed, that he might even become a bit standoff-ish. He might try to act all cool and self-controlled, because he is internally entirely out of control.

Mars in turned on by Venus immediately also. He sees Venus from across the room and the eyes follow her. Mars is very physically and sexually aroused by the way Venus moves, acts, looks, and see her as their sexual idea. So let’s say it is a woman’s Mars that conjunct a man’s Venus – when she sees him, she is aroused by his body, movement, gestures, that way he speaks to people, the way his hands touch the table or how he holds the pen. Her eyes will follow him like a hawk, and even if he is not attractive physically, his aura of magnetism and what he arouses within her causes her whole body on fire. And if it’s a man’ Mars, well, he’d be probably going right after her and start a conversation, but of course that depends on the sign and his natal placements and personality.

Venus and Mars are the eternal lovers in the sky, and when these two hot lovers meet in the same waters, all fires up in passion and sensuality. There is a match of approach. The way one wants to be approached is how the other approaches them. There is a match of style and what they are looking for and resonate with, and long for on an inner level, so the spark will be immediate.

Sometimes with people sex can feel awkward at first, but for these two there is rarely anything awkward at all – they are so intuitively and bodily aligned to one another, that every touch feels right. They understand one another’s sexual and sensual needs because it is their own also.

Their creative energies are also aligned and very fertile, so they can create many beautiful things together, and just in general, be very playful and curious and open to one another. Being open to one another is really important in relationships because we are more receptive and willing to try out new things. They can have a really fun time being playful, laughing, feeling energized by one another, feeling joyful together, and when things get monotonous in life, the spark they share will always be there to bring them into life, passion and vitality.

This aspect becomes more passionate the more they deepen their emotional connection, and this is when it all deepens in real intimacy and in love. And if the two align in a commitment and devotion, and their values, paths and personalities align, their long-term relationship will always have the strength of magnetic sexual attraction also. This aspect is one that will keep the fires burning for a long, long time. Even after four kids, even after boring daily monotonous routines, even after being old in age, these two might still be getting busy in the bedroom, and everywhere else.

According to older mystical and astrology scripts, this is an aspect showing past life lovers connection, and is one that will definitely drive the two towards each other immediately. If there are trine by the North Node, or some harmonious Saturn, this can definitely end up in marriage. It can indeed be one of the most beautiful connections you’ve shared, with passions and love blending continuously throughout the years – passion will not go away with this aspect, and even if you separate, you may still feel a sense of connection to this person, particularly because of the past life soul memory imprints.

I often describe Venus to my students and clients as a body in a dream state – how it gently moves so that it comes into its balance and most comfortable sleeping position. In other words, Venus is the energy that puts into balance all that which is not currently in balance and in harmony. This reminds us that balance is not static, it is dynamic and ever moving – it is not extreme, it must be willing to move and adjust like water, it is the meeting place of trust and faith, it is the point of time of both sunrise and sunset, when the sun kisses the arms of dawn and the moon kisses the arms of dusk.

Love too is a continuous flowing and moving, and especially in relationships, one needs to be able to adapt and adjust through years and changing natures and climates of the two people and relationship itself.

Love is a not a stone, it doesn’t just sit there, love is like bread, it needs to be made and remade each morning, each day, made anew. Dreams make beautiful stories, but what matters happens when we are awake.

So when Mars awakens Venus with a kiss, and is with her, and by her side, both people flow together in unison and natural flow. When both partners are willing to adjust and adapt, willing to put in the effort, and are emotionally open to one another, and explore and re-explore one another, and learn and re-learn the ways of holding, kissing and caring for each other not the way they always did but in the way they need right now, love can continue to flow and nurture the lands of their relationship.

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Cover film still from Paris (1926), Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.

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