I’ve shared with you about the seventh house many times on my website; we’ve looked at it from its Western perspective, from its Vedic perspective, from an Esoteric and Shamanic astrology perspective; we’ve analyzed it through a psychological perspective, a philosophical and spiritual perspectives, and we’ve even seen it from a Christian based perspective. All these, while from different views, showed its essence of higher purpose, which is that it allows us an opportunity for a deepening, and to connect to our true self, our virtues, and to something greater than us, to the divine.
Today I’ll take on a different pathway – the pathway of the evolution towards it. We’ll take the train along the first six houses, in order to see how we can build a stronger foundation of self in order to experience it in its higher purpose way.
There is no mistake that there are twelve houses in a natal chart, and the order of them is purposeful – it needs to be walked in order. Because each next depends on the previous and shapes the doorway and grounds for the next. All the houses are essentially like threads – threads going from one to the other, and that’s how we weave; and that’s how a weaving happens, under the constant beat of our heart, and our hands and feet and lips, and we become the dress.
The houses aren’t walked or travelled through just once; we walked them through activations of transits, and we also walked them each year through the so-called Profection years. For example, through the Profection years, we walk the themes of the seventh house at our ages of 19, 31, 43, 55 and 67.
While the seventh house of our natal chart is most associated with marriage and long term committed partnerships, and it also rules physical intimacy within a monogamous relationship, it is the house of the otherness. Traditionally, it wasn’t necessarily about marriage nor relationships – it was about every interaction and meeting with the other. In this otherness is the relationship, and all in life is a relationship; we are in a continuous relationship with all we come across in front of us. We are even in a relationship to the streets upon which our feet walk.
The higher purpose of the seventh house is to bring you closer to yourself and the divine, and allow you an opportunity for a deepening and alignment to your spiritual dharma. If the first house is the front door to the house that you are and your path of life and soul’s purpose, the path towards your seventh house is the walk towards your sacred union within, as it becomes the door opening you to liberation and union within. This is why the seventh house also rules long distance and foreign travels.
The first six houses of your natal chart are the right pathway, in the right order, towards experiencing the higher purpose of your seventh house and coming into deeper intimacy with romantic relationships as well. If you walk this right pathway, the seventh house then becomes its higher manifestation for you – it becomes meetings of benefit and support to your true self and path of life, and help you in your soul evolution in more harmonious ways. The seventh house then becomes complementary and supportive of your first house, i.e. your path of life, rather than being in opposition.
In other words – your seventh house doesn’t have to be in opposition to you – it is actually meant to be complementary to you and your path of life and soul evolution; it is meant to be supportive of your evolution, help you deepen into love, compassion and harmony, and develop your abilities in dealing with other people and all the otherness. It is not meant to bring to conflict and tension until forever and ever; it is not meant to bring you toxic relationships nor keep you stuck in unhealthy or karmic cycles. It is meant for you to apply wisdom, discernment and spiritual maturity towards your relationships of all kind and learn how to deal with people in appropriate ways.
This is why the seventh house carries its Venusian undertones and interweavings. Venus is the goddess’ body in her dream state, laying in her garden, and how her body gently twists and moves through the night as it seeks to bring itself into balance. This shows that Venus is all that puts into balance all that isn’t yet; and the movements show us that balance is dynamic, not static. It is a movement, and it is tenderness and softness; a softness that smooths the edges of harsh stones and rocks, just like the sea waves smooth it all. Venus is all that makes things softer – softer speech, softer hearts, softer hands. Venus is a circle – she is a vow, and she is the vows we make in all ways and shapes with another; and within the circle is the inner transformations of both people while they stay together in respect, support and loyalty for one another.
The higher purpose of the seventh house is why Saturn is exalted there – because Saturn shows our spiritual maturity, virtues, values and learning the cycles of the land, and walking with patience of rhythm. Saturn knows discipline, and more importantly, discernment – which is one of the highest spiritual gifts. Many people fear Saturn and call it malefic, but that’s not true – and I’d be more concerned about where Saturn isn’t aspecting a house in a chart, because that means in this area of life you have no brakes. And when we have no brakes, we are careless, and things happen that shouldn’t. We apply the mentality of “oh, whatever”, and have a harder time applying wisdom and effort, so may limit our development and evolution in this house. Saturn brings discipline, values and consistent amount of effort; dedication and self accountability.
The first house being ruled by Mars is the gas pedal, but we can’t be on constant gas in life – we need to know when and how to press the brakes; this is how we’ll get further in life. With Saturn exalted in the seventh, it shows the need for knowing the art of diplomacy and the art of communication and harmony in order to build and sustain long lasting and meaningful relationships of all kinds.
And so,
when we skip the steps of the first six houses, and jump directly into the seventh of relationships – then this is often when it becomes and embodies the energy of the opposition. Relationships become me against you, I versus Though, coloured by impulsivity, selfishness and lack of responsibility and accountability, and may become in detriment to your own path of life, losing your sense of self, and going astray.The otherness becomes something that takes away from you, rather than support and contribute to your path.
So when you face continuous problems in your dealings with others, regardless of what shape or form or nature these relationships are, it is helpful to reflect back to the six houses prior to see where perhaps you’ve skipped a step. You need to walk them in order; and each year, and with each cycle and transit, you will be refining them as well.
We see a trend in the world of mindless dealings, negative dealings, ignorant dealings, because no attention on the right evolution through the first six houses has been laid; people skip steps and want the instant gratification. That’s not how it works. There is an order of things. And it is only when you do the work within you that you may enter into more fulfilling relationships and experiences through the otherness, which is why the first six houses are below the horizon of your birth – it is an inner walk. And when we’ve walked the inner walk and we are devoted and dedicated to self reflect and be self aware with its turn of wheel, this is when the seventh house becomes a spiritual manifestation of a harmonious aspect to your first house – it serves as complementary to you and your path forward rather than a mere opposition.
Now let us follow the threads, and the faithfulness of lace, moving through each of the houses along the path towards the seventh.
the path to the seventh
The first house is the self, our path of life and soul’s purpose in Esoteric astrology – it is our sense of identity; it is the I, and the seventh is the Though. The first house rules the head – and we need to know our head among all other heads. Know thyself is the beginning and the foundation upon which all else lays in life and is created and build upon; and when we are aligned to our inner truth of self, and know our path, we know how to discern what’s us and what isn’t, and are able to make more discerning choices. It’s not once we walk this house, we walk it many times, and with each time, we deepen more in self knowledge and our path ahead. The first house also our body and our hygiene, and taking care of ourselves, keeping things clean and tidy. It is about not losing our heads, and keeping our eyes on our path with clarity of vision, sincere intention and action of integrity.
The second house is actually a healing house, and it rules the movements that sustain the body; this is also why it rules our mouth and throat and what we eat, because we eat food and drink water to nourish ourselves, and drink warm tea to feel well. Knowing healing techniques was an ancient art people had to learn, so that they are able to show up for those they love and be of more help. The second house is also where we build our sense of self value and self worth – what do we believe we deserve, what do we allow as behaviour from others, what are our values and what matters to us most deeply? It is the stability of our foundations once we know our head.
The third house is the house of our craftsmanship, courage and confidence – our gifts, talents and skills, how resourceful we are, the power of our words and the courage of our soul. This is a house of free will, which is why it rules the hands – what are we shaping? This is the house that rules refining the art of communication – knowing when to listen intentionally, and knowing when to speak with kindness and meaningfully. It is knowing how to build what we desire in life, which is why in ancient astrology it was called the moon’s temple, where we create and make our destiny. To love is to love with full confidence and gentle and appropriate application of skills, gifts and talents – it is an art to learn to love.
The fourth house is at the root of our chart making it one of our most important; it is how we love, how we nurture, it is our ability to love and what we perceive love to be – which is why it rules our childhood and the first chamber of the heart, which is about receiving blood and life. The fourth house rules the deepest part of ourselves, the church within, it is the home of our heart, and all we keep most private and sacred; it is what makes us feel fulfilled, feel a sense of belonging, and what we need to be in our deepest comfort. The fourth house is the house of happiness, and without having that stable root within you, having poured waters of forgiveness over your early childhood and your parental relationships, not much else in your life may be able to work out. This is why it is ruled by the moon, which is the lineage of our soul.
The fifth house rules the second chamber of our heart, which expresses the heart’s joy and nurtures creativity of the soul. It dissolves judgments and criticism, as creativity cannot ever thrive in such environments, and neither can love nor relationships thrive in critical and judgmental environments. This house is essentially about acceptance and nurturing as it follows the fourth house; and love is about acceptance of another’s true self. The fifth house is also the house of higher intelligence, which is rooted in discernment, as discernment is one of our highest spiritual gifts. We need to know how to choose correctly for us when it comes to relationships. We need to be selective and know our intentions and align to our truth of who we are and our values – which goes back to the learning of the previous houses. The fifth house also rules romance and is the house of the beginner’s mind i.e. approaching all in life and one another with curiosity and openness to learn, staying away from judgments and assumptions. No matter how long we’ve been with someone we can always learn something new; and in this we find the skills, gifts and talents applied from the third house.
The sixth house is right before the seventh and this becomes the door to it; and it is the door through discipline and devotion. It also keeps us grounded and we develop more of our discernment from the previous houses; and discernment is key. We will face many people and situations in life no matter how much inner work we’ve done, so the point is to choosely wise and know how to navigate forth. This is why the sixth is opposite the twelfth – because in the twelfth house we see the Neptunian veil of illusion and delusion, we don’t see clearly and there will always be something we don’t see; so we need discernment and groundedness, being rooted in our spiritual core and values, to move through such veiled lands. The sixth house shows us devotion – it is the house where we learn how to tend to a garden, and how to show up and be present not just when we feel like it, but always, otherwise weeds suffocate the roses. It is a house of devotion and being in service, and knowing how to take care of something other than yourself. It is a house where we learn selflessness, and this is what love is based upon.
Devotion is the veil through which awareness shows its beautiful face – and through awareness, we see another more clearly, we see ourselves more clearly, we see the interconnection and relationships of all with all – we come into the togetherness with the otherness. Devotion is to love. Humility is the bridge to love. Respect is to love.
We can only love what we appreciate. And to appreciate something we need to invest in it, tend to it, just like the Little Prince did for his rose. There are many roses in the world, but what made his his is his love for her, tending to her, showing up for her, and cleaning the weeds no matter how he felt each morning, no matter how ordinary the task was or whether he was tired. He gave to her what she needed, not what he wanted to receive in return.
Often times in relationships people give to another not what the other actually needs, but they give what they think the other should need, what they feel like, when they feel like having some time – and that’s not how love works. Love is a knowing and of being known, a seeing and of being seen, not of flesh, but through the flesh; and we need clarity of vision to see another for who they are, rather than who we want them to be to fit with us.
When the I meets the Thou
When the I meets the Thou, and two worlds merge together through their relationship within the seventh house, there is a dissolution of the false self, of the selfishness, and we come into a meaning of things, a purpose of things, a unity; a unifying of opposites and differences to inner balance and alchemy to occur. Love is a peeler – it peels the false layers off ourselves, and while we may think we lose ourselves as we are letting go of identities, conditions, dresses, we are actually finding ourselves.
The first house is the rising, and the seventh house is the sun setting; so we might imagine that when we encounter a Thou to meet our I, our self-concept becomes as undone as the sun does when it sets in the western sky – but it only does this to be raised again, raised in love. To love, to fight, to kiss and hold, and to collaborate, all requires a certain making of space, making a room for the other, and in so doing, we ourselves are changed in meaningful ways.
The seventh house is the house of undressing, intimacy and vulnerability – as true lovers only meet when one has the courage to unveil their soul and the other has the humility to unveil theirs also. If we know how to do that, having the stable foundations of all that came before the seventh, we can enter the doorways of the eight with greater confidence, courage, willingness and knowledge. The train ride will be smoother there, and the merging of the magic word “us” will happen in a different way, a better way. We’ll still entangle ourselves, because that’s what happens in intimacy and relationships, but we’ll entangle in a new way now, a better way, a purposeful and supportive way.
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Cover art is a film still from Spellbound, Public Domain, via Wikimedia Commons.