Today we’ll talk about Venus’ relationships with her three celestial men – Mars, Saturn and Pluto, and how love transforms them into their dharma and higher expression of their energies.
Understanding these relationships helps us understand how to work with her energy for our higher path, and how to blend and marry these aspects for more flow, harmony and deepening in love. This article may also be helpful to those who have harder aspects because it is actually through Venus that all softens. For example, I often have clients born in 1982 and they usually share a triple conjunction of Pluto, Mars and Saturn in the sign of Libra; so while this conjunction may be a little intense, its pathway to calm, serenity and wisdom is actually through our goddess Venus – because it is only and only Venus who tames these three boys and gives them what they desire to become men and follow their dharma.
Who is Venus
Venus is like our body in a dream state – the way it twists and curves through the night to put itself into more comfort and balance. She is that which puts into balance all that isn’t yet; and through that balance we deepen in our flow, love, we move and approach all with the beauty and wisdom that we’ve always carried within us, and we are just overall healthier, happier, more peaceful and more serene. There is tranquility that enters us through the balance of Venus.
This nightly curving of our body also shows us that balance is not static, it is dynamic and ever moving and shaping; so Venus knows how to approach people and things and situations depending on who they are, and she also knows that the way to balance isn’t fixed, isn’t absolute, it needs some gentleness and flexibility, a certain kind of movement like water.
Venus is also that which makes forms round, which is why she rules fruits like cherries. She is the waves and hands of sea which soften even the roughest edges of stones and rocks; and again, it is her flow and trust that knows the mysteries of the sea and how to soften all in its time. This reminds us that Venus is about softeness – softeness of speach, of movement, of gestures, of impact. She walks a patience and kindness of rhythm, and with the eternal and ethereal beauty of her pure heart love shines like thousand stars. Venus softens skins, which softens hearts and minds and opens our heart. This is why sometimes even moisturizing your skin, or taking a long nice bath can serve to nourish her energy within you.
Venus rules the high heart because in her highest expression she rules the holy emotions and she rules love – and it is love and only love that is the greatest power of all, and that for which all kneel. In her essence, Venus is about freedom – she is that which frees us; which softens us, opens us, opens hearts and minds and palms, and we move in our flow and creativity, because we are free.
Venus’ association with freedom is often portrayed through the paintings of her being naked – because Venus is nature, the soil and earth, the water and air and fires of suns and stars and mysteries, she is everything. She is the sunrise and sunset, the quietness and songs, the waves and lakes, she is the moonhold and dark moist wells hidden in the forests.
We become her when we walk barefoot on the cobblestone streets, have stars and salts on our skins, lovers’ winds in our hair, and thousands of constellations in our eyes full of wonder, inspiration and joy. It is this freedom that births creativity, because creativity needs freedom to breathe and thrive, and the wisdom and discernment of a true heart.
With Mars
Mars is a warrior. He is often the bad boy we fall for when we were teenagers – tattoos, motorbike, rock and roll, let’s ride until sunrise! We love his passion, his drive, his ambition and the way he walks his own drumbeat, willing to stand up and fight and not be afraid to be against the herd.
Mars is that within us which courts things – it is the ambition and drive that pushes us to go after our desire; and the only ever desire of Mars is Venus. So in our natal chart, to know our Mars we need to know our Venus – what is it we actually want and desire? And if we want to wake our Mars, we need to give it its Venus; because Mars is seduced by Venus.
You see, Mars as a warrior also likes his drama and to always have to fight or save something. He needs his blood boiling with passion, though sometimes, if not mature, he’ll burn the house down. As a teenager he likes damsels in distress, because after he saves them he feels like a man; but the problem is that unless there is more “saving” to do after, he gets bored. So an immature Mars will always need to have drama created in order to feel like a man.
Until he meets Venus. Venus is a goddess, she is a queen, she is not looking for a knight – she is looking for a king. And when he finds Venus, Mars finds his match – because Venus is his eternal beloved. Through her, he enters into the sacred marriage – the yin with the yang, the eternal lovers dancing in the sky. With facing Venus he realizes he needs to mature – he knows it isn’t about impulsivity anymore, or just fighting, it is now about the real thing, the real love, it is now about fighting for those he loves, protecting them and their privacy and having integrity.
Integrity is what matures him. And it is now only for Venus, that he takes off his armour to unveil his beating heart; and it is through this vulnerability that he learns to love and they merge. He now is a lover, not just a warrior. He now is a man.
The dharma of Mars is loyalty, integrity, alignment to higher values, courage of soul, self discipline and self control, and channeled fire towards the higher purpose of being in service to others, protecting the vulnerable and protecting the integrity of his loved ones.
With Saturn
Saturn too finds his purpose. You see, Saturn is a businessman; he’s always been mature, though sometimes a bit with a cooler exterior. He works hard and has high standards. He moves slow, and teaches us patience, and doesn’t really settle down because he seeks the real deal. You wouldn’t find him on apps or whatever else modern things people do – nope. You’ll find him at fundraisers, conferences or charity events; or somewhere chilling in quiet luxury. He can be a bit of a recluse sometimes, but that’s because he is not tempted by sparkly things. He has, I repeat, high standards.
He works hard. He has integrity, he has values, he is responsible and he is protective of his loved ones. He’s learned these qualities through obstacles and challenges, and sharpened his endurance and perseverance; but the hard work and long walks can make it harder for him to open up or find the people who can match him in maturity, or make him feel understood. So he keeps working, and climbing his mountain … until he meets his Venus, his one, his yes, the one he was seeking all along.
When Saturn looks at Venus she feels safe, cared for and appreciated; he gives her the stability and comfort she needs to unveil her sensuality and creative passions, which makes her feel secure enough to do so. Venus likes living in abundance not worrying about financial things, and Saturn offers her all she needs, so that she can focus on what she wants. And with Venus, Saturn learns to lighten up, and to allow himself make mistakes, be silly and be playful!
Venus is that which gives Saturn a higher purpose – because now he isn’t just working and achieving, he is also having fun and being playful, and through his hard work he feels purposeful in providing for her, caring for her, tending to her. Venus’ joy, pleasure and tender love rise him and raise him and support him, and he becomes even more successful because he frees himself from his own restrictions and harsh self expectations. Venus is that which softens him and returns him to love and optimism and inspiration. Venus infuses in him her love and he becomes creative, wise, he embodies the spiritual mastery and wisdom that he was always meant to be.
He sees himself for the man of integrity he always was, and now he has his true love to share his abundance with. Caring for her is his deepest pleasure, and she is the only one who is able to pull him out of the moments of discouragement or even sadness that he feels; she helps him take off the burdens of responsibilities he carries and she holds his hand, and embraces him with her serenity, joy and sweetness. Together, hand in hand, they make the sweetest of wine and we see how patience truly is the mark of truest love.
The dharma of Saturn is maturity, responsibility, providing stability and security, balance and emotional vulnerability, and becoming and embodying the spiritual wisdom of patience and the cycles of the land and nature.
With Pluto
All three Mars, Saturn and Pluto essentially free themselves and mature through Venus: Mars frees himself from impulsivity and destruction, Saturn frees himself from burdens and limitations, and Pluto frees himself from his own self imprisonment.
Just like Hades, the only reason the tall dark handsome prince of the underworld Pluto ever shows himself on the surface is the beautiful kind-hearted maiden – whose joy, innocence and purity of beauty and love are so bright that their light reaches even the deepest of soils. Surely, it is only for such love that he will reach his hands through the soil for merging. Because at his core, like all human beings, Pluto too is inspired by goodness, by beauty, by grace, by kindness, and he too, like all human beings, wants to be the best version of himself. He needs to learn to love.
Tempted by air, tempted by water, he reaches his hands through the soil for merging. Pluto comes to the surface because he seeks the freedom of air, and the freedom of life and emotions. He wants to be seen, he wants to be heard, he wants the parts of him and all aspects of him to be acknowledged and recognized. He wants to be a better man not just hide in some corners never fully entering the kingdom of love where he can dissolve the boundaries and deepen into true intimacy and merging with his beloved.
Pluto is that within us which holds all of our suppressed things, undealt-with things, unacknowledged things, ashamed things, all things we fear and don’t want to admit to ourselves. He controls us because we don’t want to see these things, and everything we suppress is essentially what has power over us and controls us. We keep these things to ourselves, in our undergrounds, deep down in the dark where they just stay, pile up and eventually begin to weighs us down even more.
The problem is that these become the game playing, the control and power dynamics, the jealousies and possessiveness – because all these stem from insecurities and the undealt-with things and our suppressed things. And the more things we suppress and we hide from ourselves, the more external things we’ll do to fill the void. So we go into lust, greed – and yet it’s never enough and we keep feeling empty; and it’s never enough and we keep feeling empty because we are not actually fulfilling the unmet needs within us. For example, the unmet need of lust is emotional connection and love. So behind all these Plutonian compulsions are unmet real needs, and until realized through our self honesty and willingness to alchemize ourselves through the fires, nothing will ever be enough and we will keep being imprisoned in perpetual karmic cycles. Pluto seeks emotional depth, truth, connection and love; but unless he is honest with himself, he’s just going to play his little games because he is stuck in his boy psychology.
The deepest desire of our Pluto though is actually freedom. He desires freedom, he desires to be seen, heard and held. He desires to let go of the control and submit, because the greatest desire of those who are controlling are not release the control and know the feeling of its opposite: surrender.
Venus rules freedom, she is free in her love and joy. And this is why Pluto gets so smitten and desirous about her, because in her he sees he can free himself – and he reaches through the soil and shows himself. It is only for love and love only that Pluto is ready and willing to show his true self, with all his fears and weaknesses, and become the vulnerable man ready for deep soul intimacy rather than a boy playing games from the dark corners or behind screens. And when you meet the man whose Pluto is mature and dharmic, you know what it feels like to be looked at like you are the only one in the world. Because when a real man of emotional and spiritual maturity looks at a woman he loves, it is soul binding and intimate; and even in a room full of strangers and noise, it feels it’s only you two.
The dharma of Pluto is facing its shadows and compulsions, rising into self truth through the courage of deep transformation, and understanding what true power really is and how to contribute to humanity through the virtues and insight that his transformation has gifted him.
Final notes:
So how can you apply this if for example you have a hard aspect related to these? Give yourself that Venus, soften these various masculine aspects of your chart through the energy of your Venus. Remember that there are no bad aspects, each one is an aspect of something within you and is purposeful – just like all of our cells have their own purpose. Some are fighters, some protectors, some relaxers, all are needed and work together in unison.
So for example, if you have some harder time with your Mars and it needs some taming, make him a lover not just a fighter, and find something meaningful to fight for such as a social cause rather than creating drama around. Know what it is you are actually courting and desiring by understanding your own Venus also. Or if you have a sleepy Mars, tempt it and seduce it to fire up with passion and drive by giving it your Venus.
Or if you are having a harder Saturn, take time for relaxation, soften the body and mind, go get a massage, don’t push too hard – embody your Venus. Appreciate and cherish yourself, and find those who support you; and also, have mercy on yourself, don’t be so self critical.
As for Pluto aspects – love is healing. Love is what makes us as human beings to try to be better people. Don’t be afraid of your emotions and face your undergrounds, all these need are just to be acknowleged and seen by you. And when you fall in love, be willing to take off the armours and masks and don’t play games; embody your king energy, your maturity, because the only thing that’s sexy and seducing are actually emotional depth and emotional intelligence, and the openness to be vulnerable, loyal and brave in love. Love is a kingdom for the brave.
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The beautiful cover art is by Vicente Romero Redondo. All rights reserved to the artist. His official website is https://vicenteromeroredondo.com/