Words are powerful, they are mini Gods. Every day we make the choice to speak love or not, to encourage someone or not. We make a choice on what kind of prayer we want to weave ourselves into, and on the kind of change we want to make in someone’s life, and all of our world.
In our modern day I have noticed that on a collective level we have forgotten how to speak and the importance that our words carry. We often use emojis or memes to express ourselves, we say gorg instead of gorgeous, we say lol instead of actually laughing, and often times our words sound robotic and disconnected – which eventually lead us to feel disconnected from our true selves within.
Our words carry powerful energy and we need to be mindful of how we use them as responsibility holds the hand of all that is of power. Our words carry meaning that we should have the humility to see, notice, understand and treasure. Our words need to have some weight to them because in many ways they are a reflection of who we are and what we hold as values and integrity in our own lives. Our words become us, so we should be mindful of the kind of relationship we build through them towards ourselves and with other people.
Words are powerful, and words are essentially our faith embodied. It’s like prayer. And we pray ourselves into being each and every day. We pray when we cook, when we speak, when we move, when we write, when we dance, when we create, when we love and when we believe. But usually, these are unconscious. In every word is the potential energy and the power to expand or contract our experience forward.
Ultimately, our words, whether spoken consciously or unconsciously, whether towards ourselves or others, become our thought patterns which then become our behavioural patterns, and then – our physical movements, gestures and experiences. This is why it is really important to be mindful of what words we use as our way of language. With our modern day use of weightless words, and words filled with ugliness, ignorance and vulgarity, we are only limiting ourselves further. We need to learn and awaken ourselves into the art of language. We can live our life as a beautiful prayer, as we weave letters like pearls and beauty of words into a necklace of love and of inspiration.
Today I’ll share four things we should never speak with others, also known as the four unwholesome speeches. Unwholesome refers to the concept of anything that doesn’t bring meaning or purpose, nor is it of true heart and grace. Our wellbeing, and that of others in the way we contribute to their lives through our mutual interaction, is largely dependent on what our tongues choose to speak; and we must embody the humility and responsibility of weaving the various aspects of love through our lips, hands and every day gestures.
1. Stay away from lying.
We’ve all spoken little white lies here and there, and whether it is big ones or small ones, white lies, red lies, black lies, purple lies, we should do our best to stay away from lying as it can be harmful to our lives. The reason why it can be harmful is that when we lie it can destroy our trust and the way we even view our own selves and our character. Trust is what relationships are built upon – and everything in life is a relationship. We are in a continuous relationship with ourselves, our body, our friends and family, our partners, other people, nature, and even the streets upon which our feet walk every day.
We need to live a truthful life, and trust is one of the most, if not the most, important ingredients in our relationships. Once broken, it is hard to ever trust our partner again. Trust takes long time to build and it is built along the way in all the little things we do and say to one another. Our words should reflect our actions and intentions because otherwise they lose their meaning, they lose their weight, and they are robbed of the soul of their matter.
2. Do not use divisive speech.
Divisive speech is essentially creating drama or some separation between people by using our words. It can be gossiping, talking behind someone’s back, or humiliating someone. When you engage in these, it can be really harmful to your life. On one hand – it is harmful to you because it shows your lack of integrity, emotional maturity and compassion; and eventually no one will want to trust you or be involved with you. Moreover, it is lowering your own vibration and causes negativity in your aura, weakness in your energy, and builds up karma. Do not break the relationships between people using your words, because you are essentially breaking your own relationship to your inner self, your path forward, to truth and to love.
And if someone uses this against you, or has talked behind your back or gossiped about you, you need to just walk away from them because they have just showed you who they truly are. Do not seek to engage or do onto them as they onto you, do your best to remain peaceful in your heart and mind, and in the deep knowing that this is about them and not you. People who engage in such low level of energy and use their words for such harm onto others usually do so out of jealousy or anger or deep insecurity – they have their own karmas to live and walk, so just disengage from them rather than entangling with them further and hurting your own self in the process absorbing their negative energy.
3. Stay away from harsh speech.
When someone has hurt us of course it is natural reaction to want to protect and defend ourselves, especially when their treatment of us has been so unfair and unjust. We’ve all been at the receiving end of harsh speeches from others and it is deeply hurtful. And while we are not in control of how other people treat us with their words, we have control over what we choose to do in turn. Harsh speech can take many forms such as speaking out of anger, criticizing someone, name calling, shaming, putting them down, etc.
I have noticed some people disguising their harsh speeches by saying “I am just being honest” but no – you are being hurtful. It is not up to you to spread your version of truth onto other people and judge them and burden them with your emotional outbursts. Knowing your boundaries and respecting the boundaries of other is a sign of intelligence, higher values and emotional maturity. We are all responsible for how we affect others by our choice of speech. Being honest does not mean being hurtful in any shape or form. Use your words responsibly and just disengage from those who do not respect you, support you and love you.
4. Stay away from idle chatter.
Idle chatter refers to speaking meaningless and useless things. Of course we can all have fun and chatter in playfulness and curiosity, discussing funny or even “meaningless” series or news – but we should know our limits when it refers to other people. We need to know our boundaries, and not to cross these, nor allow others to cross ours also. When our speech begins to be unproductive, we need to be mindful of that.
By knowing the meaning, purpose and intention of our words, we can create wonderful, beautiful and happy moments in other people’s lives and in our own lives also. We can create positive experiences and positive emotions, and this is the power that our words carry. Think of how amazingly and uplifted you felt when someone spoke to you kindness, love and support – they infused you with wonder and comfort. Your entire energy changed! Think of how much more inspired you felt in an experience because of someone’s support or choice of a beautiful word to describe what you experienced or accomplished or did. Think of how loved you felt when someone told you how much you helped them or made them happy.
The words we speak create karma along the way, and do not think they are only sounds coming out of our mouths. They create experiences, feelings, emotions, thought patterns, and eventually gestures. The way we treat others will inevitably reflect on how we’ll experience our lives moving forward. And because they are our words, they are our energy and our inner world – do you want to create the air we breathe within pure and fresh, or poisoned and polluted.
Reflect on how you speak to yourself also. When you are having a bad day, as we all do sometimes, speak to yourself with kindness and stay away from being too harsh or self-critical. Have compassion and forgiveness for yourself, because otherwise you’ll translate this towards others also. The more emotional capacity we build in our selves to have the space of compassion and kindness, the more we’ll hold that loving space for others too when they too go through their hard times. Words are like little knives – we can use them to harm or we can use them to weave and sew our beautiful dresses and make a meal to feed ourselves and our loved ones. Use them wisely, with intention and with beauty – and then see how beautifully your life transforms when you choose to speak love, inspiration and beauty into it. You will, because when you speak it, you’ll see it as your eyes will naturally shift towards it.
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Cover art: Claude Monet, The Water Lily Pond, W.1897, via Wikimedia Commons.