As I pass through the backyard heading home I see a little sparrow lying on the walkway. Not moving. I kneel next to it as my heart sinks hoping it’d move and fly away; hoping it isn’t dead but may be it is just … resting? But still, the sparrow is not moving. I look around. May be it hit something and collapsed, so it will wake up? But there is nothing around except a few leaves on the ground. I stand up. It can’t be dead. I sit on the bench beside it. May be if I stay here long enough, it will wake up. It’s been 20 minutes. Still, the sparrow isn’t moving. I guess my eyes can’t lie. My heart sinks further. I feel so sad. There must be more reasons why it may look dead even if it isn’t.
When I was nine years old I saw my kitten get killed by a dog in the backyard as I watched horrified through the window. I was banging on the glass hoping it’d all stop but it didn’t. And then my kitten laid there. Not moving. May be it will move. But it didn’t. My mom went out wrapped it and rest it in peace. I didn’t say his name for years. I told everyone not to talk about him either. Topi. No. This is not Topi.
May be the sparrow just lost consciousness for a little bit. But I know that if it doesn’t wake up, I need to wrap its body and lay it to rest in peace. I can’t let it stay there vulnerable to predators or people crossing by. I just need a little while longer … I am not leaving it though, that’s for sure. I am staying right here beside it.